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Christmas

  • Quick View

    GIFTY GIFTY NEVER GETS

    Birthday
    Inside: Now you know why this card didn't come with a gift. (You're either a spoiled asshole kid or a grown-up that can buy their own damn stuff.)
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    TOO MUCH LOVE

    Cards
    Front: Time to buy gifts for everyone we love. Inside: Fuck. We love too many people.
    $5.50
  • Out Of Stock
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    BULLSHIT

    Cards
    Front: Another holiday season. Inside: This is bullshit.
    $5.50
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    HOLIDAY HOLIDAY

    Christmas
    Inside: Tip 3. Send out passive aggressive cards "joking" about how you hate the holidays. (Is it a joke? Or not? Best just keep to yourself.)
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    CREDIT THEFT

    Christmas
    Inside: You get to run around like crazy making sure the day is special for your family, but with zero credit because of "Santa." (Don't forget to buy a special role of "Santa" wrapping paper.)
    $5.50
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    TREE TRIMMING TIME

    Cards
    Front: Time to trim the tree. Inside: And some people outta my life.
    $5.50
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    FIGHT CLUB

    Cards
    Front: I heard Mr. and Mrs. Claus are fighting. Inside: They're members of the North Pole fight club.
    $5.50
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    THE BIG O

    Cards
    Front: All I want for Christmas is you. Inside: And a really big orgasm.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    SNOW DAY

    Cards
    Front: Let it snow. Let it snow. Let it snow. Inside: As long as I don't have to drive anywhere.
    $5.50
  • Out Of Stock
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    UGHXMAS

    Cards
    Front: It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Inside: Ugh.
    $5.50
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    ONLY ME

    Cards
    Front: We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas. Inside: Well, I do. The rest of my family doesn't give a crap.
    $5.50
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    WHAM BAM

    Cards
    Front: Last Christmas I gave you my heart. Inside: Wait, did I say heart? I meant herpes.
    $5.50
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    GET YOUR FAT ASS OVER HERE

    Cards
    Front: The stockings are hung by the mantel with care. Inside: Now we're just waiting for Santa's fat ass.
    $5.00
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    HIPPIE DIPPIE BOLOGNA

    Cards
    Front: Have you picked out your Christmas tree? Inside: Or are you one of those tree-loving hippies?
    $5.50
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    FLY RUDOLPH FLY

    Cards
    Front: I know how Santa gets his reindeer to fly. Inside: Edibles.
    $5.00
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    SANTA’S FAVE STRIP JOINT

    Cards
    Front: I met Prancer and Vixen. Inside: They work at a strip joint downtown.
    $5.00
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    EXPECT THE BEST

    Cards
    Front: This Christmas will be great. Inside: As long as you buy me something fucking amazing.
    $5.00
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    CANCEL THIS SHIT

    Cards
    Front: Did you hear the news? Inside: Santa died.  Christmas is cancelled.
    $5.00
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    BIG STUPID HEAD

    Cards
    Front: Have you ever wondered why Rudolph has a red nose? Inside: It's just a huge zit.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    CHRISTMAS CHEER

    Cards
    Front: Sending you some Christmas cheer. Inside: From a safe fucking distance.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    YOU’RE TOO MUCH

    Cards
    Front: It's too bad we can't spend the holidays together. Inside: Just kidding. We needed a year off.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    MALLS WILL BLEED YOU DRY

    Cards
    Front: Time to go shopping. Inside: This fucking sucks.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    MRS. BITCH CLAUS

    Cards
    Front: Santa Claus is great. Inside: But Mrs. Claus is a real bitch.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    TRAFFIC STOP

    Cards
    Front: Have you ever wondered where Santa gets his money? Inside: It's from sex trafficking.
    $5.00

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  • Quick View

    GIFTY GIFTY NEVER GETS

    Birthday
    Inside: Now you know why this card didn't come with a gift. (You're either a spoiled asshole kid or a grown-up that can buy their own damn stuff.)
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    TOO MUCH LOVE

    Cards
    Front: Time to buy gifts for everyone we love. Inside: Fuck. We love too many people.
    $5.50
  • Out Of Stock
    Quick View

    BULLSHIT

    Cards
    Front: Another holiday season. Inside: This is bullshit.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    HOLIDAY HOLIDAY

    Christmas
    Inside: Tip 3. Send out passive aggressive cards "joking" about how you hate the holidays. (Is it a joke? Or not? Best just keep to yourself.)
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    CREDIT THEFT

    Christmas
    Inside: You get to run around like crazy making sure the day is special for your family, but with zero credit because of "Santa." (Don't forget to buy a special role of "Santa" wrapping paper.)
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    TREE TRIMMING TIME

    Cards
    Front: Time to trim the tree. Inside: And some people outta my life.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    FIGHT CLUB

    Cards
    Front: I heard Mr. and Mrs. Claus are fighting. Inside: They're members of the North Pole fight club.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    THE BIG O

    Cards
    Front: All I want for Christmas is you. Inside: And a really big orgasm.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    SNOW DAY

    Cards
    Front: Let it snow. Let it snow. Let it snow. Inside: As long as I don't have to drive anywhere.
    $5.50
  • Out Of Stock
    Quick View

    UGHXMAS

    Cards
    Front: It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Inside: Ugh.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    ONLY ME

    Cards
    Front: We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas. Inside: Well, I do. The rest of my family doesn't give a crap.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    WHAM BAM

    Cards
    Front: Last Christmas I gave you my heart. Inside: Wait, did I say heart? I meant herpes.
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    GET YOUR FAT ASS OVER HERE

    Cards
    Front: The stockings are hung by the mantel with care. Inside: Now we're just waiting for Santa's fat ass.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    HIPPIE DIPPIE BOLOGNA

    Cards
    Front: Have you picked out your Christmas tree? Inside: Or are you one of those tree-loving hippies?
    $5.50
  • Quick View

    FLY RUDOLPH FLY

    Cards
    Front: I know how Santa gets his reindeer to fly. Inside: Edibles.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    SANTA’S FAVE STRIP JOINT

    Cards
    Front: I met Prancer and Vixen. Inside: They work at a strip joint downtown.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    EXPECT THE BEST

    Cards
    Front: This Christmas will be great. Inside: As long as you buy me something fucking amazing.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    CANCEL THIS SHIT

    Cards
    Front: Did you hear the news? Inside: Santa died.  Christmas is cancelled.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    BIG STUPID HEAD

    Cards
    Front: Have you ever wondered why Rudolph has a red nose? Inside: It's just a huge zit.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    CHRISTMAS CHEER

    Cards
    Front: Sending you some Christmas cheer. Inside: From a safe fucking distance.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    YOU’RE TOO MUCH

    Cards
    Front: It's too bad we can't spend the holidays together. Inside: Just kidding. We needed a year off.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    MALLS WILL BLEED YOU DRY

    Cards
    Front: Time to go shopping. Inside: This fucking sucks.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    MRS. BITCH CLAUS

    Cards
    Front: Santa Claus is great. Inside: But Mrs. Claus is a real bitch.
    $5.00
  • Quick View

    TRAFFIC STOP

    Cards
    Front: Have you ever wondered where Santa gets his money? Inside: It's from sex trafficking.
    $5.00
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