Front: Babies are great.
Back: Unless you get one of the weird looking ones.
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Front: Sugar and spice and everything nice.
Back: Until puberty turns her into a bitch.
Front: I guess it’s time to baby-proof the house.
Back: You don’t want any of those little buggers getting in.
Front: Congrats on a great addition to the family.
Back: Though a dog would have been a better choice.