Birthday
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COVID BLANK
Front: We’re ready for this asshole virus to fuck off. Inside: Blank$5.00 Add to cartFront: We’re ready for this asshole virus to fuck off.
Inside: Blank
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FUCKING COVID
Front: Sorry we couldn’t celebrate together. Inside: Fucking Covid.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Sorry we couldn’t celebrate together.
Inside: Fucking Covid.
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NO CASH VALUE
Front: Everyone loves getting money in a card. Inside: But I don't want to put a dollar value on our relationship.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Everyone loves getting money in a card.
Inside: But I don’t want to put a dollar value on our relationship. -
TOO MUCH MOOLA
Front: We found you the perfect birthday gift. Inside: It was expensive. So we didn't buy it.$5.00 Add to cartFront: We found you the perfect birthday gift.
Inside: It was expensive. So we didn’t buy it. -
CRAZY SHIT
Front: You deserve to be celebrated. Inside: You do a lot of crazy shit... And you're still alive.$5.00 Add to cartFront: You deserve to be celebrated.
Inside: You do a lot of crazy shit… And you’re still alive. -
COME CUM
Front: Your birthday is coming... Inside: And I will make you cum on your birthday.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Your birthday is coming…
Inside: And I will make you cum on your birthday. -
STOP GETTING OLD
Front: Every year you get older. Inside: And every year I like you less.$2.50 Add to cartFront: Every year you get older.
Inside: And every year I like you less. -
NOT AN AGELESS BEAUTY
Front: You haven't aged a day since we met. Inside: But you looked old back then.$5.00 Add to cartFront: You haven’t aged a day since we met.
Inside: But you looked old back then. -
CARD CARD GIFT CARD
Front: Want your birthday gift? Inside: Here's a gift card. Go get it.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Want your birthday gift?
Inside: Here’s a gift card. Go get it. -
NATALIE LIKES OWLS
Front: You're a real hoot. Inside: Oops, I mean ho. You're a real ho.$5.00 Add to cartFront: You’re a real hoot.
Inside: Oops, I mean ho. You’re a real ho. -
FUCKING BIRTHDAYS
Box set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: Happy Birthday. INSIDE: Holy fuck, you're old. FRONT: It's your birthday. INSIDE: Whoop-dee-fucking-doo. FRONT: Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. INSIDE: Shut the fuck up. FRONT: You only live once. INSIDE: Too bad you already fucked up. FRONT: May all your birthday wishes come true. INSIDE: Except for that one. You fucking pervert. FRONT: Have a very happy birthday. INSIDE: Or don't. I don't fucking care.$25.00 Add to cartBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box.
FRONT: Happy Birthday.
INSIDE: Holy fuck, you’re old.FRONT: It’s your birthday.
INSIDE: Whoop-dee-fucking-doo.FRONT: Happy birthday to you.
Happy birthday to you.
INSIDE: Shut the fuck up.FRONT: You only live once.
INSIDE: Too bad you already fucked up.FRONT: May all your birthday wishes come true.
INSIDE: Except for that one.
You fucking pervert.FRONT: Have a very happy birthday.
INSIDE: Or don’t.
I don’t fucking care. -
THE ESSENTIALS
Box set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: Thank you. INSIDE: You're fucking awesome. FRONT: Let's celebrate. INSIDE: I'll get the hookers. You get the blow. FRONT: It's great that you two found each other. INSIDE: Weirdos gotta stick together. FRONT: Babies are great. INSIDE: Unless you get one of the weird looking ones. FRONT: Happy birthday. INSIDE: Holy fuck, you're old. FRONT: Another year older. INSIDE: And you're still an asshole.$25.00 Select optionsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box.
FRONT: Thank you.
INSIDE: You’re fucking awesome.FRONT: Let’s celebrate.
INSIDE: I’ll get the hookers. You get the blow.FRONT: It’s great that you two found each other.
INSIDE: Weirdos gotta stick together.FRONT: Babies are great.
INSIDE: Unless you get one of the weird looking ones.FRONT: Happy birthday.
INSIDE: Holy fuck, you’re old.FRONT: Another year older.
INSIDE: And you’re still an asshole. -
BEST OF BIRTHDAYS
Box set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: It's your birthday. INSIDE: So go fuck yourself. FRONT: Make a wish and blow out your candles. INSIDE: Then blow yourself. Cocksucker. FRONT: I heard it's your birthday. INSIDE: I also heard I don't give a shit. FRONT: You always throw the best birthday parties. INSIDE: Is it to make up for your small penis? FRONT: Have a happy birthday. INSIDE: Or rot in hell you old bastard. FRONT: You know who loves birthday parties? INSIDE: Little sissies.$25.00 Add to cartBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box.
FRONT: It’s your birthday.
INSIDE: So go fuck yourself.FRONT: Make a wish and blow out your candles.
INSIDE: Then blow yourself. Cocksucker.FRONT: I heard it’s your birthday.
INSIDE: I also heard I don’t give a shit.FRONT: You always throw the best birthday parties.
INSIDE: Is it to make up for your small penis?FRONT: Have a happy birthday.
INSIDE: Or rot in hell you old bastard.FRONT: You know who loves birthday parties?
INSIDE: Little sissies. -
BITCH PARTY
Front: It's party time. Back: Where my bitches at?$5.00 Add to cartFront: It’s party time.
Back: Where my bitches at? -
JUST SAY NO
Front: Let's go celebrate. Back: I'll get the hookers. You get the blow.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Let’s go celebrate.
Back: I’ll get the hookers. You get the blow. -
MISTAKES HAPPEN
Front: Let's celebrate your birth. Inside: Even though you were an unplanned pregnancy.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Let’s celebrate your birth.
Inside: Even though you were an unplanned pregnancy.
