New Arrivals
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DEAL FIVE
Lots of people have been spending the pandemic making babies... so now is a great time to stock up on New Baby cards! This deal contains 5 soon-to-be discontinued New Baby cards for only $10.00! Front: I can’t wait to see your new baby. Inside: I hear it’s real ugly. Front: Word on the street is that you’re having a baby. Inside: Gross. Front: You have a bun in the oven? Inside: I thought you were just fat. Front: I heard you got knocked up. Inside: Congratulations. I guess. Front: Congratulations on your new baby. Inside: Do you know who the daddy is?Lots of people have been spending the pandemic making babies… so now is a great time to stock up on New Baby cards!
This deal contains 5 soon-to-be discontinued New Baby cards for only $10.00!
Front: I can’t wait to see your new baby.
Inside: I hear it’s real ugly.Front: Word on the street is that you’re having a baby.
Inside: Gross.Front: You have a bun in the oven?
Inside: I thought you were just fat.Front: I heard you got knocked up.
Inside: Congratulations. I guess.Front: Congratulations on your new baby.
Inside: Do you know who the daddy is?$25.00$10.00 Add to cart -
DEAL FOUR
These 8″ x 8″ canvas paintings are NOT prints! They were each hand-painted by Nikki (that’s me!) using acrylic paints and my warped sense of humour. I don’t make these little guys any more, so they’re pretty rare! They've been hanging around my office forever and I just want to find them a good home.  So here's a collection of 4 of them for a fraction of the original price! The paintings included in this set are: - Stop being a douchebag. - Masturbation is fun. - I love sluts. - Swearing is fucking funny. Only one set is available, so buy now!These 8″ x 8″ canvas paintings are NOT prints! They were each hand-painted by Nikki (that’s me!) using acrylic paints and my warped sense of humour. I don’t make these little guys any more, so they’re pretty rare!
They’ve been hanging around my office forever and I just want to find them a good home. Â So here’s a collection of 4 of them for a fraction of the original price!
The paintings included in this set are:
– Stop being a douchebag.
– Masturbation is fun.
– I love sluts.
– Swearing is fucking funny.Only one set is available, so buy now!
$240.00$30.00 Add to cart -
DEAL THREE
Get a package of 15 postcards and 10 random vulgar magnets for more than 50% off! Â The postcards celebrate those weird holidays that are totally worth celebrating, but are not widely-known. Like Bill Murray Appreciation Day, Coffee Day and Underwear Day! Â The magnets will be a random assortment of our vulgar magnets like the ones seen in the picture. Unfortunately you can't pick and choose which ones you get, but I can say they will vary in vulgarness (is that a word?). Only ten of these sets are available, so buy now!Get a package of 15 postcards and 10 random vulgar magnets for more than 50% off! Â The postcards celebrate those weird holidays that are totally worth celebrating, but are not widely-known. Like Bill Murray Appreciation Day, Coffee Day and Underwear Day! Â The magnets will be a random assortment of our vulgar magnets like the ones seen in the picture. Unfortunately you can’t pick and choose which ones you get, but I can say they will vary in vulgarness (is that a word?).
Only ten of these sets are available, so buy now!
$55.00$25.00 Add to cart -
DEAL ONE
Despite popular belief, these 8″ x 8″ canvas paintings are NOT prints! Each one of our canvases is hand-painted by Nikki (that’s me!) using acrylic paints and a steady hand. I don’t make these little guys any more (I stopped ages ago!) and they were limited edition to begin with, so they’re extremely rare and maybe after I die they’ll be worth something? Maybe? (Like a bitcoin or two). They've been hanging around my office forever and I just want to find them a good home.  So here's a collection of 6 of them for a fraction of the original price! Only one set is available, so buy now!Despite popular belief, these 8″ x 8″ canvas paintings are NOT prints! Each one of our canvases is hand-painted by Nikki (that’s me!) using acrylic paints and a steady hand. I don’t make these little guys any more (I stopped ages ago!) and they were limited edition to begin with, so they’re extremely rare and maybe after I die they’ll be worth something? Maybe? (Like a bitcoin or two).
They’ve been hanging around my office forever and I just want to find them a good home. Â So here’s a collection of 6 of them for a fraction of the original price!
Only one set is available, so buy now!
$360.00$30.00 Select options -
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BETTER LATE THAN NEVER
Front:Â I promise I didn't forget your birthday. Inside:Â I just forgot to buy a card on time.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â I promise I didn’t forget your birthday.
Inside:Â I just forgot to buy a card on time. -
SOCIAL MEDIA WIN
Front:Â I know your birthday was the other day... Inside:Â I just needed social media to remind me.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â I know your birthday was the other day…
Inside:Â I just needed social media to remind me. -
PICKY NOSE PICKER
Front:Â Gift cards are the perfect gift. Inside:Â For people that are too damn picky.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Gift cards are the perfect gift.
Inside:Â For people that are too damn picky. -
FUCKING BIRTHDAY
Front:Â Heard that you're celebrating a big day. Inside:Â Happy fucking birthday.$5.00 Select optionsFront:Â Heard that you’re celebrating a big day.
Inside:Â Happy fucking birthday. -
DAY DRINK DAY DRUNK
Front:Â Got big birthday plans? Inside:Â Or another night of drinking alone?$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Got big birthday plans?
Inside:Â Or another night of drinking alone? -
NETFLIX, CARD, AND CHILL
Front:Â You deserve a huge birthday celebration. Inside:Â But I'm just giving you a card and buying take-out.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â You deserve a huge birthday celebration.
Inside:Â But I’m just giving you a card and buying take-out. -
SILVER SHORT CURLY
Front:Â Getting older isn't so bad. Inside:Â Until the first grey pubic hair arrives.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Getting older isn’t so bad.
Inside:Â Until the first grey pubic hair arrives. -
BEST GIFT OF ALL
Front:Â Happy birthday to my dearest love. Inside:Â Instead of a gift can I just go down on you?$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Happy birthday to my dearest love.
Inside:Â Instead of a gift can I just go down on you? -
ALL ABOUT YOU
Front:Â Today is all about you. Inside:Â You're so selfish.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Today is all about you.
Inside:Â You’re so selfish. -
TOO OLD FOR THAT SHIT
Front:Â Birthdays are a time to party. Inside:Â Too bad we're too old for that shit.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Birthdays are a time to party.
Inside:Â Too bad we’re too old for that shit. -
OUT AND PROUD
Front:Â Congratulations on coming out. Inside:Â I'm fucking proud of you.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Congratulations on coming out.
Inside:Â I’m fucking proud of you. -
PRIDE BOT
Front:Â Love who you wanna love. Inside:Â I really don't give a shit.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Love who you wanna love.
Inside:Â I really don’t give a shit. -
UNDERWEAR DON’T CARE
Front:Â You're the best. Inside:Â No matter what's in those undies.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â You’re the best.
Inside:Â No matter what’s in those undies. -
SAME OLD JERK
Front:Â New name. New pronoun. Inside:Â Same old jerk on the inside.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â New name. New pronoun.
Inside:Â Same old jerk on the inside. -
MR. AND MR. ASSHOLE
Front:Â Congratulations Mrs. and Mrs. Inside: You two bitches deserve each other.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Congratulations Mrs. and Mrs.
Inside: You two bitches deserve each other. -
MRS. AND MRS. BITCH
Front:Â Congratulations Mrs. and Mrs. Inside: You two bitches deserve each other.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Congratulations Mrs. and Mrs.
Inside: You two bitches deserve each other. -
FAKE NEWS
Front:Â Congratulations. Inside: That's fucking awesome news.$5.00 Add to cartFront:Â Congratulations.
Inside: That’s fucking awesome news.
HAPPY NEW YEAR
Well, here we are… another new year! I’m sure I’m not the only one that had a weird 2021. So let us all hope that
COLOURING CONTEST
My kid recently won a colouring contest (hooray for her!!!) and it inspired me to hold a contest of my own! There are 2 different
ONE HELL OF A TIME…
Here we are at the end of November and the year has only gotten weirder and more difficult… at least for folks that live in
HELP AN INDIGENOUS COMMUNITY
Yesterday was a big day for Indigenous communities across Canada. The first National Day for Truth and Reconciliation. Canada is rich with First Nations, Metis
FINALLY, NEW CARDS + WEBSITE UPDATES!
Hello beautiful people. Over the past couple of weeks I’ve been busy designing some new cards! It’s been awhile since I went on a designing
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Top Sellers
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DUSTIN IS SO OLDSCHOOL
Front: Happy Birthday. Inside: Holy fuck, you're old.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Happy Birthday.
Inside: Holy fuck, you’re old. -
WHEN IS YOUR BIRTHDAY
Front: It's your birthday. Inside: Or was your birthday? Or is almost your birthday? When the fuck is your birthday?$5.00 Add to cartFront: It’s your birthday.
Inside: Or was your birthday? Or is almost your birthday? When the fuck is your birthday? -
DRINK DRANK DRUNK
Front: Another birthday. Inside: Another reason to get shit-faced.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Another birthday.
Inside: Another reason to get shit-faced. -
FUCK US AWESOMELY
Front: Thank you. Back: You're fucking awesome.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Thank you.
Back: You’re fucking awesome. -
CRAZY SHIT
Front: You deserve to be celebrated. Inside: You do a lot of crazy shit... And you're still alive.$5.00 Select optionsFront: You deserve to be celebrated.
Inside: You do a lot of crazy shit… And you’re still alive. -
OLD BROAD
Front: Happy Birthday. Inside: You old broad.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Happy Birthday.
Inside: You old broad. -
WHOOP DEE DOO
Front: It's your birthday. Inside: Whoop-dee-fucking-doo.$5.00 Add to cartFront: It’s your birthday.
Inside: Whoop-dee-fucking-doo. -
WHAT AN ASS
Front: Another year older. Inside: And you're still an asshole.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Another year older.
Inside: And you’re still an asshole. -
BOOBIES
Front: It must be your birthday. Inside: I can tell because your boobs are sagging.$5.00 Add to cartFront: It must be your birthday.
Inside: I can tell because your boobs are sagging. -
HAPPY WHATEVER
Front: Happy Holidays. Inside: Or whatever the fuck we're supposed to say not to be offensive.$5.00 Add to cartFront: Happy Holidays.
Inside: Or whatever the fuck we’re supposed to say not to be offensive.