MOTHER’S DAY IS COMING
April 25, 2024
Christmas
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Quick ViewHAPPY WHATEVER
CardsFront: Happy Holidays. Inside: Or whatever the fuck we're supposed to say not to be offensive.$5.00 -
Quick ViewCARROT WANG
CardsFront: Frosty was at the winter carnival. Inside: He was flashing everyone his carrot wang.$5.00 -
Sale!
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Quick ViewGREETING CARD MYSTERY BAG – HOLIDAY EDITION
Box SetsHoliday Edition Greeting Card Mystery Bags include a random mix of 10 of our (amazing and hilarious) Christmas (and maybe 1 Hanukkah) greeting cards and 10 plain white envelopes for $30 (that's just $3.00/card)! The contents will differ from one bag to a next and none of the bags will have repeats!$30.00 -
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Quick ViewREINDEER MEAT
CardsFront: I saw a couple of Santa's reindeer recently. Inside: I slaughtered them. Their meat is delicious.$5.00 -
Quick ViewMERRY CHRISTMAS OR WHATEVER
CardsFront: We wish you a Merry Christmas. Inside: Well, some of us do...$5.00 -
Quick ViewWILD THINGS
CardsFront: Have you ever wondered what reindeer do on their days off? Inside: You don't want to know. It's wildly inappropriate.$5.00 -
Quick ViewFOXY CHRISTMAS
CardsFront: Christmas is all about friends and family. Inside: It's too bad that you don't have either.$5.00 -
Quick ViewSANTA SATAN
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: We went to see Santa. INSIDE: He smelled like a dead hobo. FRONT: It's Christmas. INSIDE: Too bad Santa hates you. FRONT: Do you believe in Santa? INSIDE: Get your head out your ass. He's not real. FRONT: Every Christmas Santa eats our cookies and drinks our milk. INSIDE: Then he takes a huge dump in our bathroom. FRONT: Hopefully Santa doesn't forget my house. INSIDE: I want to ride that jolly son-of-a-bitch all night. FRONT: I waited up all night to see Santa. INSIDE: He was wasted and there was a hooker in his sleigh.$25.00 -
Out Of Stock
Quick ViewBEST OF CHRISTMAS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. INSIDE: He must be stalking you. FRONT: Grandmas got ran over by a reindeer again. INSIDE: That bitch had it coming. FRONT: You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen? INSIDE: They're assholes. FRONT: 'Tis the season. INSIDE: To get chubby. FRONT: Have a holly, jolly Christmas. INSIDE: By getting druuuuunk. FRONT: We went to see Santa. INSIDE: He smelled like a dead hobo.$25.00 -
Out Of Stock
Quick ViewFUCKING XMAS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: It's Christmas. INSIDE: But who the fuck cares? FRONT: Every Christmas I send you a card in the mail. INSIDE: And this year is no fucking different. FRONT: Santa asked me what you wanted for Christmas. INSIDE: I told him to fuck off. FRONT: It's Christmas time. INSIDE: Fuck you and fuck your family. FRONT: I love elves. INSIDE: Those little fuckers know how to party. FRONT: Have yourself a merry little Christmas. INSIDE: And a happy fucking New Year.$25.00 -
Quick ViewLOST ART FART
CardsFront: Sending Christmas cards is almost a lost art. Inside: So you're an asshole if you don't return one.$5.00 -
Quick ViewBAD CREDIT SCORE
CardsFront: The holiday season is the best. Back: Until the credit card statement arrives.$5.00 -
Quick ViewHOLIDAY CARD
CardsFront: It's the most wonderful time of year. Back: Though writing in all the cards is a pain in the ass.$5.00 -
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Out Of Stock
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Quick ViewHAPPY FUCKING NEW YEAR
CardsFront: Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Back: And a happy fucking New Year.$5.00 -
Quick ViewBANG BANG BANG
CardsFront: Let's trim the tree and put up the stockings. Back: And then bang until the New Year.$5.00 -
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Quick ViewWORKING WITH ASSHOLES
CardsFront: You know Dasher and Dancer? Prancer and Vixen? Back: They're assholes.$5.00
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Quick View
HAPPY WHATEVER
CardsFront: Happy Holidays. Inside: Or whatever the fuck we're supposed to say not to be offensive.$5.00 -
Quick View
CARROT WANG
CardsFront: Frosty was at the winter carnival. Inside: He was flashing everyone his carrot wang.$5.00 -
Sale!Quick View
-
Quick View
GREETING CARD MYSTERY BAG – HOLIDAY EDITION
Box SetsHoliday Edition Greeting Card Mystery Bags include a random mix of 10 of our (amazing and hilarious) Christmas (and maybe 1 Hanukkah) greeting cards and 10 plain white envelopes for $30 (that's just $3.00/card)! The contents will differ from one bag to a next and none of the bags will have repeats!$30.00 -
Quick View
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REINDEER MEAT
CardsFront: I saw a couple of Santa's reindeer recently. Inside: I slaughtered them. Their meat is delicious.$5.00 -
Quick View
MERRY CHRISTMAS OR WHATEVER
CardsFront: We wish you a Merry Christmas. Inside: Well, some of us do...$5.00 -
Quick View
WILD THINGS
CardsFront: Have you ever wondered what reindeer do on their days off? Inside: You don't want to know. It's wildly inappropriate.$5.00 -
Quick View
FOXY CHRISTMAS
CardsFront: Christmas is all about friends and family. Inside: It's too bad that you don't have either.$5.00 -
Quick View
SANTA SATAN
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: We went to see Santa. INSIDE: He smelled like a dead hobo. FRONT: It's Christmas. INSIDE: Too bad Santa hates you. FRONT: Do you believe in Santa? INSIDE: Get your head out your ass. He's not real. FRONT: Every Christmas Santa eats our cookies and drinks our milk. INSIDE: Then he takes a huge dump in our bathroom. FRONT: Hopefully Santa doesn't forget my house. INSIDE: I want to ride that jolly son-of-a-bitch all night. FRONT: I waited up all night to see Santa. INSIDE: He was wasted and there was a hooker in his sleigh.$25.00 -
Out Of StockQuick View
BEST OF CHRISTMAS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. INSIDE: He must be stalking you. FRONT: Grandmas got ran over by a reindeer again. INSIDE: That bitch had it coming. FRONT: You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen? INSIDE: They're assholes. FRONT: 'Tis the season. INSIDE: To get chubby. FRONT: Have a holly, jolly Christmas. INSIDE: By getting druuuuunk. FRONT: We went to see Santa. INSIDE: He smelled like a dead hobo.$25.00 -
Out Of StockQuick View
FUCKING XMAS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: It's Christmas. INSIDE: But who the fuck cares? FRONT: Every Christmas I send you a card in the mail. INSIDE: And this year is no fucking different. FRONT: Santa asked me what you wanted for Christmas. INSIDE: I told him to fuck off. FRONT: It's Christmas time. INSIDE: Fuck you and fuck your family. FRONT: I love elves. INSIDE: Those little fuckers know how to party. FRONT: Have yourself a merry little Christmas. INSIDE: And a happy fucking New Year.$25.00 -
Quick View
LOST ART FART
CardsFront: Sending Christmas cards is almost a lost art. Inside: So you're an asshole if you don't return one.$5.00 -
Quick View
BAD CREDIT SCORE
CardsFront: The holiday season is the best. Back: Until the credit card statement arrives.$5.00 -
Quick View
HOLIDAY CARD
CardsFront: It's the most wonderful time of year. Back: Though writing in all the cards is a pain in the ass.$5.00 -
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Out Of StockQuick View
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HAPPY FUCKING NEW YEAR
CardsFront: Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Back: And a happy fucking New Year.$5.00 -
Quick View
BANG BANG BANG
CardsFront: Let's trim the tree and put up the stockings. Back: And then bang until the New Year.$5.00 -
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WORKING WITH ASSHOLES
CardsFront: You know Dasher and Dancer? Prancer and Vixen? Back: They're assholes.$5.00
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