THE EVOLUTION OF OUR OFFICE
January 26, 2026
Bird
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Hot
Quick ViewNO SPOUSE NO PROBLEM
BirthdayFront: What do you get for the single, childless person in your life? Inside: Nothing. Their life is already perfect.$5.95 -
Hot
Quick ViewCRAZY ASSHOLES
Father's DayFront: Dads, stepdads, grandpas, and fathers-in-law... Inside: Are they all complete assholes or just you?$5.95 -
Hot
Quick ViewCRAZY BITCHES
Mother's DayFront: Moms, step moms, grandmas, mother-in-laws. Inside: Are they all crazy bitches or just you?$5.95 -
Hot
Quick ViewQUIT YOUR DAY JOB
Mother's DayFront: A stay-at-home-mom is the hardest job in the world. Inside: Are you ready to quit yet?$5.95 -
Hot
Quick ViewDO BETTER
New BabyFront: You are going to make excellent parents. Inside: Just do the opposite of whatever your parents did.$5.95 -
Out Of Stock
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Quick ViewGIFTY GIFTY NEVER GETS
BirthdayInside: Now you know why this card didn't come with a gift. (You're either a spoiled asshole kid or a grown-up that can buy their own damn stuff.)$5.95 -
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Quick ViewFUCKING BIRTHDAY CARDS
BirthdayInside: Reason 4. It likely means that I was invited to a celebration of some sort. (That means being around people.)$5.95 -
Quick ViewBIG ONE
BirthdayInside: Reason 4. You're getting pretty old, so you should celebrate while you still can. (Did you know that statistically you are 14% more likely to die on your birthday than any other day? Try not to party that hard.)$5.95 -
Quick ViewWHAM BAM
ChristmasFront: Last Christmas I gave you my heart. Inside: Wait, did I say heart? I meant herpes.$5.95 -
Quick ViewHIPPIE DIPPIE BOLOGNA
ChristmasFront: Have you picked out your Christmas tree? Inside: Or are you one of those tree-loving hippies?$5.95 -
Quick ViewEXPECT THE BEST
ChristmasFront: This Christmas will be great. Inside: As long as you buy me something fucking amazing.$5.95 -
Quick ViewNO CASH VALUE
BirthdayFront: Everyone loves getting money in a card. Inside: But I don't want to put a dollar value on our relationship.$5.95 -
Quick ViewLOVE MARRIAGE BABIES
CardsFront: First comes love. Then comes marriage. Inside: Then everyone starts bugging you about having kids.$5.00 -
Quick ViewCOME CUM
BirthdayFront: Your birthday is coming... Inside: And I will make you cum on your birthday.$5.95 -
Sale!
Quick ViewLITTLE BRAT
Mother's DayFront: Since it's your first Mother's Day I thought I'd get you a card. Inside: We both know your little brat won't get you anything.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!
Quick ViewBIRDS HAVE HOUSES TOO
New HomeFront: Your new house is great. Inside: But mine is better.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!
Quick ViewI WANT YOU TO LEAVE
GoodbyeFront: A little bird told me that you're leaving. Inside: Good riddance.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!
Quick ViewLITTLE BRAT
Father's DayFront: Since it's your first Father's Day I thought I'd get you a card. Inside: We both know your little brat won't get you anything.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Quick ViewOH BABY BABY
New BabyFront: I adore babies. Inside: But don't expect babysitting. Or diaper changes.$5.00 -
Sale!
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Sale!Quick View
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Sale!
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HotQuick View
NO SPOUSE NO PROBLEM
BirthdayFront: What do you get for the single, childless person in your life? Inside: Nothing. Their life is already perfect.$5.95 -
HotQuick View
CRAZY ASSHOLES
Father's DayFront: Dads, stepdads, grandpas, and fathers-in-law... Inside: Are they all complete assholes or just you?$5.95 -
HotQuick View
CRAZY BITCHES
Mother's DayFront: Moms, step moms, grandmas, mother-in-laws. Inside: Are they all crazy bitches or just you?$5.95 -
HotQuick View
QUIT YOUR DAY JOB
Mother's DayFront: A stay-at-home-mom is the hardest job in the world. Inside: Are you ready to quit yet?$5.95 -
HotQuick View
DO BETTER
New BabyFront: You are going to make excellent parents. Inside: Just do the opposite of whatever your parents did.$5.95 -
Out Of StockQuick View
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Quick View
GIFTY GIFTY NEVER GETS
BirthdayInside: Now you know why this card didn't come with a gift. (You're either a spoiled asshole kid or a grown-up that can buy their own damn stuff.)$5.95 -
Quick View
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Quick View
FUCKING BIRTHDAY CARDS
BirthdayInside: Reason 4. It likely means that I was invited to a celebration of some sort. (That means being around people.)$5.95 -
Quick View
BIG ONE
BirthdayInside: Reason 4. You're getting pretty old, so you should celebrate while you still can. (Did you know that statistically you are 14% more likely to die on your birthday than any other day? Try not to party that hard.)$5.95 -
Quick View
WHAM BAM
ChristmasFront: Last Christmas I gave you my heart. Inside: Wait, did I say heart? I meant herpes.$5.95 -
Quick View
HIPPIE DIPPIE BOLOGNA
ChristmasFront: Have you picked out your Christmas tree? Inside: Or are you one of those tree-loving hippies?$5.95 -
Quick View
EXPECT THE BEST
ChristmasFront: This Christmas will be great. Inside: As long as you buy me something fucking amazing.$5.95 -
Quick View
NO CASH VALUE
BirthdayFront: Everyone loves getting money in a card. Inside: But I don't want to put a dollar value on our relationship.$5.95 -
Quick View
LOVE MARRIAGE BABIES
CardsFront: First comes love. Then comes marriage. Inside: Then everyone starts bugging you about having kids.$5.00 -
Quick View
COME CUM
BirthdayFront: Your birthday is coming... Inside: And I will make you cum on your birthday.$5.95 -
Sale!Quick View
LITTLE BRAT
Mother's DayFront: Since it's your first Mother's Day I thought I'd get you a card. Inside: We both know your little brat won't get you anything.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!Quick View
BIRDS HAVE HOUSES TOO
New HomeFront: Your new house is great. Inside: But mine is better.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!Quick View
I WANT YOU TO LEAVE
GoodbyeFront: A little bird told me that you're leaving. Inside: Good riddance.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!Quick View
LITTLE BRAT
Father's DayFront: Since it's your first Father's Day I thought I'd get you a card. Inside: We both know your little brat won't get you anything.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Quick View
OH BABY BABY
New BabyFront: I adore babies. Inside: But don't expect babysitting. Or diaper changes.$5.00 -
Sale!Quick View
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Sale!Quick View
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Sale!Quick View
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