GETTING MY SHIT TOGETHER
April 8, 2024
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Quick ViewWINSOME HEROES
New HomeFront: What a beautiful new home. Inside: Sure beats the dump that I'm living in.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewPENIS FOR BRAINS
GraduationFront: You graduated. Inside: I though you could only think with your penis.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewDUMBASS MORON
GraduationFront: I'm proud of you. Inside: But then again, what kind of moron can't graduate?$1.00 -
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Quick ViewFREE MOUSTACHE RIDES
Good LuckFront: I wish you the best of luck. Inside: Even though you don't deserve it.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewI WANT YOU TO LEAVE
GoodbyeFront: A little bird told me that you're leaving. Inside: Good riddance.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewBAD DADDY
Father's DayFront: Congratulations on your first Father's Day. Inside: You're doing a terrible job.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewLITTLE BRAT
Father's DayFront: Since it's your first Father's Day I thought I'd get you a card. Inside: We both know your little brat won't get you anything.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewHAPPY BIRTHDAY FAT ASS
Belated BirthdayFront: Your birthday just slipped my mind. Inside: I guess I was too busy thinking about your fat ass.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewWE’RE NOT FRIENDS
Belated BirthdayFront: A real friend would never forget your birthday. Inside: Which explains why I forgot yours. We're not really friends.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewTHE ELEPHANT FORGOT
Belated BirthdayFront: Happy belated birthday. Inside: I'm sorry, but you're easy to forget.$2.00 -
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Quick ViewSTOP GETTING OLD
BirthdayFront: Every year you get older. Inside: And every year I like you less.$1.00 -
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STOP GETTING OLD
BirthdayFront: Every year you get older. Inside: And every year I like you less.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewCAN’T BUY ME LOVE
New BabyFront: Congratulations. Inside: Now you finally have someone to love you.$1.00 -
Quick ViewYOU GOT KNOCKED UP
New BabyFront: I heard you got knocked up. Inside: Congratulations. I guess.$5.00 -
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Quick ViewSTROLLER GIRL
New BabyFront: Congratulations on your new baby. Inside: Do you know who the daddy is?$2.00 -
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Quick ViewSTROLLER BOY
New BabyFront: Congratulations on your new baby. Inside: Do you know who the daddy is?$1.00 -
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Quick ViewYOU ANNOY ME
AnniversaryFront: Our anniversary is a day to celebrate our love. Inside: Too bad I can't stand to look at you any more.$1.00 -
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Quick ViewGREETING CARD MYSTERY BAG – HOLIDAY EDITION
Box SetsHoliday Edition Greeting Card Mystery Bags include a random mix of 10 of our (amazing and hilarious) Christmas (and maybe 1 Hanukkah) greeting cards and 10 plain white envelopes for $30 (that's just $3.00/card)! The contents will differ from one bag to a next and none of the bags will have repeats!$30.00 -
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Quick ViewREINDEER MEAT
CardsFront: I saw a couple of Santa's reindeer recently. Inside: I slaughtered them. Their meat is delicious.$5.00 -
Quick ViewMERRY CHRISTMAS OR WHATEVER
CardsFront: We wish you a Merry Christmas. Inside: Well, some of us do...$5.00 -
Quick ViewWILD THINGS
CardsFront: Have you ever wondered what reindeer do on their days off? Inside: You don't want to know. It's wildly inappropriate.$5.00
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