
Shop
-
-
ONLY ME
ChristmasFront: We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas. Inside: Well, I do. The rest of my family doesn't give a crap.$5.95 -
WHAM BAM
ChristmasFront: Last Christmas I gave you my heart. Inside: Wait, did I say heart? I meant herpes.$5.95 -
BETTER LATE THAN NEVER
Belated BirthdayFront: I promise I didn't forget your birthday. Inside: I just forgot to buy a card on time.$5.95 -
SOCIAL MEDIA WIN
Belated BirthdayFront: I know your birthday was the other day... Inside: I just needed social media to remind me.$5.95 -
PICKY NOSE PICKER
BirthdayFront: Gift cards are the perfect gift. Inside: For people that are too damn picky.$5.95 -
FUCKING BIRTHDAY
BirthdayFront: Heard that you're celebrating a big day. Inside: Happy fucking birthday.$5.95 -
DAY DRINK DAY DRUNK
BirthdayFront: Got big birthday plans? Inside: Or another night of drinking alone?$5.95 -
NETFLIX, CARD, AND CHILL
BirthdayFront: You deserve a huge birthday celebration. Inside: But I'm just giving you a card and buying take-out.$5.95 -
SILVER SHORT CURLY
BirthdayFront: Getting older isn't so bad. Inside: Until the first grey pubic hair arrives.$5.95 -
BEST GIFT OF ALL
BirthdayFront: Happy birthday to my dearest love. Inside: Instead of a gift can I just go down on you?$5.95 -
-
TOO OLD FOR THAT SHIT
BirthdayFront: Birthdays are a time to party. Inside: Too bad we're too old for that shit.$5.95 -
OUT AND PROUD
CongratulationsFront: Congratulations on coming out. Inside: I'm fucking proud of you.$5.95 -
-
UNDERWEAR DON’T CARE
FriendshipFront: You're the best. Inside: No matter what's in those undies.$5.95 -
-
MR. AND MR. ASSHOLE
LGBTQFront: Congratulations Mrs. and Mrs. Inside: You two bitches deserve each other.$5.50 -
MRS. AND MRS. BITCH
LGBTQFront: Congratulations Mrs. and Mrs. Inside: You two bitches deserve each other.$5.50 -
-
GET YOUR FAT ASS OVER HERE
ChristmasFront: The stockings are hung by the mantel with care. Inside: Now we're just waiting for Santa's fat ass.$5.95
Shop by Categories
Main Menu
Don't miss the deals
Latest from blog
Social Networks

FREE Shipping & Return
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur

Money Back Guarantee
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur

24/7 Online Support
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur
-
HIPPIE DIPPIE BOLOGNA
ChristmasFront: Have you picked out your Christmas tree? Inside: Or are you one of those tree-loving hippies?$5.95 -
-
SANTA’S FAVE STRIP JOINT
ChristmasFront: I met Prancer and Vixen. Inside: They work at a strip joint downtown.$5.95 -
EXPECT THE BEST
ChristmasFront: This Christmas will be great. Inside: As long as you buy me something fucking amazing.$5.95 -
CANCEL THIS SHIT
ChristmasFront: Did you hear the news? Inside: Santa died. Christmas is cancelled.$5.95 -
BIG STUPID HEAD
ChristmasFront: Have you ever wondered why Rudolph has a red nose? Inside: It's just a huge zit.$5.95 -
CHRISTMAS CHEER
ChristmasFront: Sending you some Christmas cheer. Inside: From a safe fucking distance.$5.00 -
YOU’RE TOO MUCH
ChristmasFront: It's too bad we can't spend the holidays together. Inside: Just kidding. We needed a year off.$5.95 -
SNIP SNIP TIME
Father's DayFront: You are a great husband and father. Inside: But it's time for the snip-snip$5.95 -
-
ALL ABOUT YOU DAD
Father's DayFront: Today is all about you dad. Inside: You self-entitled jerk.$5.00 -
WIFE AND MOTHER
CardsFront: You are an excellent wife and an even better mother. Inside: Seriously. I could use more attention.$5.00 -
-
-
CARELESS OR RECKLESS
ParentingFront: You make parenting look easy. Inside: Probably because you don't give a shit.$5.00 -
SHIT ON MY HEAD
ParentingFront: Thank you for raising me. Inside: I know I was a little shithead.$5.95 -
NO CASH VALUE
BirthdayFront: Everyone loves getting money in a card. Inside: But I don't want to put a dollar value on our relationship.$5.95 -
TOO MUCH MOOLA
BirthdayFront: We found you the perfect birthday gift. Inside: It was expensive. So we didn't buy it.$5.95 -
LOVE MARRIAGE BABIES
CardsFront: First comes love. Then comes marriage. Inside: Then everyone starts bugging you about having kids.$5.00 -
-
-
-
MRS. BITCH CLAUS
ChristmasFront: Santa Claus is great. Inside: But Mrs. Claus is a real bitch.$5.95 -
TRAFFIC STOP
ChristmasFront: Have you ever wondered where Santa gets his money? Inside: It's from sex trafficking.$5.00
NEWSLETTER
Signup for Sales & Promotions
Every once in awhile we send an email. It’s usually about new products, special sales and whatever else people may (or may not) find interesting.



















































































