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FUCKING BIRTHDAYS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: Happy Birthday. INSIDE: Holy fuck, you're old. FRONT: It's your birthday. INSIDE: Whoop-dee-fucking-doo. FRONT: Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. INSIDE: Shut the fuck up. FRONT: You only live once. INSIDE: Too bad you already fucked up. FRONT: May all your birthday wishes come true. INSIDE: Except for that one. You fucking pervert. FRONT: Have a very happy birthday. INSIDE: Or don't. I don't fucking care.$27.00 -
THE ESSENTIALS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: Thank you. INSIDE: You're fucking awesome. FRONT: Let's celebrate. INSIDE: I'll get the hookers. You get the blow. FRONT: It's great that you two found each other. INSIDE: Weirdos gotta stick together. FRONT: Babies are great. INSIDE: Unless you get one of the weird looking ones. FRONT: Happy birthday. INSIDE: Holy fuck, you're old. FRONT: Another year older. INSIDE: And you're still an asshole.$27.00 -
BEST OF BIRTHDAYS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: It's your birthday. INSIDE: So go fuck yourself. FRONT: Make a wish and blow out your candles. INSIDE: Then blow yourself. Cocksucker. FRONT: I heard it's your birthday. INSIDE: I also heard I don't give a shit. FRONT: You always throw the best birthday parties. INSIDE: Is it to make up for your small penis? FRONT: Have a happy birthday. INSIDE: Or rot in hell you old bastard. FRONT: You know who loves birthday parties? INSIDE: Little sissies.$27.00 -
SANTA SATAN
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: We went to see Santa. INSIDE: He smelled like a dead hobo. FRONT: It's Christmas. INSIDE: Too bad Santa hates you. FRONT: Do you believe in Santa? INSIDE: Get your head out your ass. He's not real. FRONT: Every Christmas Santa eats our cookies and drinks our milk. INSIDE: Then he takes a huge dump in our bathroom. FRONT: Hopefully Santa doesn't forget my house. INSIDE: I want to ride that jolly son-of-a-bitch all night. FRONT: I waited up all night to see Santa. INSIDE: He was wasted and there was a hooker in his sleigh.$27.00 -
BEST OF CHRISTMAS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: He sees you when you're sleeping. He knows when you're awake. INSIDE: He must be stalking you. FRONT: Grandmas got ran over by a reindeer again. INSIDE: That bitch had it coming. FRONT: You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen? INSIDE: They're assholes. FRONT: 'Tis the season. INSIDE: To get chubby. FRONT: Have a holly, jolly Christmas. INSIDE: By getting druuuuunk. FRONT: We went to see Santa. INSIDE: He smelled like a dead hobo.$27.00 -
FUCKING XMAS
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: It's Christmas. INSIDE: But who the fuck cares? FRONT: Every Christmas I send you a card in the mail. INSIDE: And this year is no fucking different. FRONT: Santa asked me what you wanted for Christmas. INSIDE: I told him to fuck off. FRONT: It's Christmas time. INSIDE: Fuck you and fuck your family. FRONT: I love elves. INSIDE: Those little fuckers know how to party. FRONT: Have yourself a merry little Christmas. INSIDE: And a happy fucking New Year.$27.00 -
XXX RATED
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: Mr. and Mrs. Claus are perfect together. INSIDE: She let's him do it up the ass. FRONT: Rudolph is the best. INSIDE: He has a really big dick. FRONT: I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus. INSIDE: I always knew she was a whore. FRONT: I love Santa. INSIDE: He makes my panties wet. FRONT: Let's go to the North Pole. INSIDE: I hear the orgies are insane. FRONT: I sat on Santa's lap. INSIDE: It gave him a boner.$27.00 -
CHRISTMAS FAVOURITES
Box SetsBox set contains 6 cards + 6 envelopes in a plastic box. FRONT: I heard you're on Santa's naughty list. INSIDE: Slut. FRONT: I saw Santa last night. INSIDE: He was banging your mom. FRONT: There's only one thing I want for Christmas. INSIDE: You. Naked. FRONT: I love elves. INSIDE: Those little fuckers know how to party. FRONT: It's true what they say about Christmas. INSIDE: It's fucking awesome. FRONT: It's that time of year again. INSIDE: Fuck.$27.00 -
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WE’RE NOT WORTHY
CardsFront: Heard you got married. Inside: Guess some people weren't invited.$5.00 -
CURLY HAIRED FUCKER
CardsFront: I always knew you two would get married. Inside: But that doesn't mean I approve.$5.00Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
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COUPLE OF LOSERS
CardsFront: You're the type of couple that will be together forever. Inside: Yeah right. You don't stand a chance.$5.00 -
I THEE WED
CardsFront: Marriage is a wonderful thing. Inside: For the first few months anyway.$5.00 -
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LOPES TIMES TWO
CardsFront: Congratulations on your big day. Inside: It's about fucking time.$5.50 -
PLEASE, DON’T DO IT
CardsFront: Congratulations. Inside: Remember, it's not too late until you say "I do."$5.00 -
SOUNDS LIKE A SHOTGUN
CardsFront: I heard you're getting hitched. Inside: You get knocked up or something?$5.00 -
I CAN’T BELIEVE IT
SaleFront: So you're engaged? Inside: I'm surprised someone considers you marriage material.$5.00Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
UPPER LIP HAIR
SaleFront: You'll make a beautiful bride. Inside: But you should probably lose the moustache.$5.00Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95.
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FROM US FUCKERS
Thank youFront: People just don't send thank you cards like they used to. Inside: Fucking jerks.$5.95 -
WE HAVE MANNERS
Thank youFront: We don't know how to thank you. Back: So we'll just sign our names in this card.$5.00 -
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CARDS SAY IT ALL
Thank youFront: There aren't words big enough to show my gratitude. Back: So thanks.$5.95 -
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LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE
SorryFront: I'm so sorry. It will never happen again. Back: Okay, that's a lie. It probably will.$5.00 -
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RIGHT ALL THE TIME
SorryFront: I must say, I'm really sorry. Back: It must piss you off that I'm always right.$5.00 -
HIPPOS PLAY GUITAR
SaleFront: I'm sorry. Back: That it didn't happen sooner.$5.00Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
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SHITTY ATTITUDE
RetirementFront: I'm happy to hear that you're retiring. Inside: Now I don't have to put up with your shitty attitude.$5.95 -
I WANT YOU GONE
RetirementFront: It's great that you're retiring. Inside: I've been wanting to get rid of you for years.$5.00 -
OUT OF YOUR MIND
RetirementFront: I heard you retired. Inside: Are you out of your fucking mind?$5.00 -
SUCKERS MOTHERFUCKERS
RetirementFront: Congrats on your retirement. Inside: Work is for suckers anyway.$5.95
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