THE EVOLUTION OF OUR OFFICE
January 26, 2026
Cards
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Quick ViewALL ABOUT YOU DAD
Father's DayFront: Today is all about you dad. Inside: You self-entitled jerk.$5.00 -
Quick ViewWIFE AND MOTHER
CardsFront: You are an excellent wife and an even better mother. Inside: Seriously. I could use more attention.$5.00 -
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Quick ViewCARELESS OR RECKLESS
ParentingFront: You make parenting look easy. Inside: Probably because you don't give a shit.$5.00 -
Quick ViewSHIT ON MY HEAD
ParentingFront: Thank you for raising me. Inside: I know I was a little shithead.$5.95 -
Quick ViewNO CASH VALUE
BirthdayFront: Everyone loves getting money in a card. Inside: But I don't want to put a dollar value on our relationship.$5.95 -
Quick ViewTOO MUCH MOOLA
BirthdayFront: We found you the perfect birthday gift. Inside: It was expensive. So we didn't buy it.$5.95 -
Quick ViewLOVE MARRIAGE BABIES
CardsFront: First comes love. Then comes marriage. Inside: Then everyone starts bugging you about having kids.$5.00 -
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Quick ViewMRS. BITCH CLAUS
ChristmasFront: Santa Claus is great. Inside: But Mrs. Claus is a real bitch.$5.95 -
Quick ViewTRAFFIC STOP
ChristmasFront: Have you ever wondered where Santa gets his money? Inside: It's from sex trafficking.$5.00 -
Quick ViewHAPPY WHATEVER
ChristmasFront: Happy Holidays. Inside: Or whatever the fuck we're supposed to say not to be offensive.$5.95 -
Quick ViewCARROT WANG
ChristmasFront: Frosty was at the winter carnival. Inside: He was flashing everyone his carrot wang.$5.95 -
Quick ViewMAIL ORDER BRIDE
WeddingFront: Congrats on finding the perfect bride. Inside: Did you buy her off the internet?$5.00 -
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Quick ViewCRAZY SHIT
BirthdayFront: You deserve to be celebrated. Inside: You do a lot of crazy shit... And you're still alive.$5.95 -
Quick ViewCOME CUM
BirthdayFront: Your birthday is coming... Inside: And I will make you cum on your birthday.$5.95 -
Sale!
Quick ViewYOU SUCK TOGETHER
SaleFront: Enjoy your wedding day. Inside: Because I won't.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!
Quick ViewQUITTERS NEVER WED
SaleFront: You're taking the walk down the aisle? Inside: I thought you were going to quit on this like you do everything else.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!
Quick ViewSHEEPISH WEDDING
SaleFront: Both of you have done a lot of wonderful things in your life. Inside: But getting married isn't one of them.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95.
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Quick View
-
Quick View
ALL ABOUT YOU DAD
Father's DayFront: Today is all about you dad. Inside: You self-entitled jerk.$5.00 -
Quick View
WIFE AND MOTHER
CardsFront: You are an excellent wife and an even better mother. Inside: Seriously. I could use more attention.$5.00 -
Quick View
-
Quick View
-
Quick View
CARELESS OR RECKLESS
ParentingFront: You make parenting look easy. Inside: Probably because you don't give a shit.$5.00 -
Quick View
SHIT ON MY HEAD
ParentingFront: Thank you for raising me. Inside: I know I was a little shithead.$5.95 -
Quick View
NO CASH VALUE
BirthdayFront: Everyone loves getting money in a card. Inside: But I don't want to put a dollar value on our relationship.$5.95 -
Quick View
TOO MUCH MOOLA
BirthdayFront: We found you the perfect birthday gift. Inside: It was expensive. So we didn't buy it.$5.95 -
Quick View
LOVE MARRIAGE BABIES
CardsFront: First comes love. Then comes marriage. Inside: Then everyone starts bugging you about having kids.$5.00 -
Quick View
-
Quick View
-
Quick View
-
Quick View
MRS. BITCH CLAUS
ChristmasFront: Santa Claus is great. Inside: But Mrs. Claus is a real bitch.$5.95 -
Quick View
TRAFFIC STOP
ChristmasFront: Have you ever wondered where Santa gets his money? Inside: It's from sex trafficking.$5.00 -
Quick View
HAPPY WHATEVER
ChristmasFront: Happy Holidays. Inside: Or whatever the fuck we're supposed to say not to be offensive.$5.95 -
Quick View
CARROT WANG
ChristmasFront: Frosty was at the winter carnival. Inside: He was flashing everyone his carrot wang.$5.95 -
Quick View
MAIL ORDER BRIDE
WeddingFront: Congrats on finding the perfect bride. Inside: Did you buy her off the internet?$5.00 -
Quick View
-
Quick View
CRAZY SHIT
BirthdayFront: You deserve to be celebrated. Inside: You do a lot of crazy shit... And you're still alive.$5.95 -
Quick View
COME CUM
BirthdayFront: Your birthday is coming... Inside: And I will make you cum on your birthday.$5.95 -
Sale!Quick View
YOU SUCK TOGETHER
SaleFront: Enjoy your wedding day. Inside: Because I won't.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!Quick View
QUITTERS NEVER WED
SaleFront: You're taking the walk down the aisle? Inside: I thought you were going to quit on this like you do everything else.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95. -
Sale!Quick View
SHEEPISH WEDDING
SaleFront: Both of you have done a lot of wonderful things in your life. Inside: But getting married isn't one of them.Original price was: $5.00.$1.95Current price is: $1.95.
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